I’ve Gone too Far Pt. 1

“Hear, O heavens, and give ear, O Earth: for the Lord hath spoken, I have nourished and brought up children, and they have rebelled against me.” Isaiah 1:2

 

By the grace of God, I am not the same person that I was on November 24, 2014 when the Lord ALLOWED me to hit rock bottom.  

 

I won’t stand before you and pretend that I woke up one morning and my sinful nature was gone. I’m not foolish enough to expect you to believe I did a 360 overnight. I refuse to falsely claim I completely trusted in the Lord, the day I quit doing drugs. I cannot confirm, before you, that I completely understood what was happening in my life. To say that I became fully committed to my walk of faith would be a lie. BUT, by the grace of God, there was a change being made. There was a revival within my heart that only the High and Mighty Savior of the Universe could be leading. When I look up the word revival, words such as recovery and improvement appear. Praise God that He took the time to look upon me and say “I want her in my kingdom, she is valuable.” Without Him choosing to start a recovery process, from within, I was helpless.

I had rebelled against my savior, my family, and my friends. The people who raised me seemed to be suffering the consequences of doing so. Isaiah 1:2 reads, “Hear, O heavens, and give ear, O Earth: for the Lord hath spoken, I have nourished and brought up children, and they rebelled against me.”

That was me and there was no denying it. I was rebelling against all sources of authority. I cannot honor my parents when I am dishonoring the Lord. If I am rebelling against my Lord, how can I honor my mother and father? The two go hand in hand. Immediately, I was able to think back to my childhood when I would cry for love or affection and my grandmother would hold me and rock me. She gave me comfort and showed me how loved I am. Everything in the world seemed to be just fine, when I was there in her arms. The list goes on and on of the care that I received from my family throughout the years.

Nobody’s life can be perfect, but I had no right to bring down the very people who brought me up. I can look back at what I put my family through from the drugs, to the disrespect, and the nights that they would stay up wondering if I would come home. It took a long time for me to accept forgiveness from my earthly parents and my heavenly Father. I did not feel worthy of their acceptance after all I had done to them, but they graciously wrapped me up in their arms and loved me as if I was the same little girl who they would rock when I had a bad day at school. They accepted me with open arms and they just wanted their daughter back.

I have already admitted to you that I was not a saint overnight, but something much more incredible happened. I had my joy back. I felt an overwhelming sense of grace, love, and peace.

Ponder this.. If my earthly parents were so gracious, then how was my Heavenly Father responding?

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